Friends, you can't live with 'em . . .

Scripture for the week:

All my enemies whisper together against me; they imagine the worst for me . . . Even my close friend, whom I trusted, he who shared my bread, has lifted up his heel against me. Psalm 41:7, 9 (NIV)

Dear Friend,

On many occasions we have experienced the pain of relationships, but some experiences have been much harder than others. The most painful times have been when it was a close friend . . . one we "trusted, who shared our bread and then lifted his heel against us." A few years ago during a very challenging time in our lives we had friends who bailed on us. They pretended they loved us to our faces, but whispered behind our backs and left us when we needed them. It was one of those moments of real betrayal. We asked ourselves, "Who can we really trust?" Then we answered ourselves, "People just can't be trusted. They love you to your face, but don't fail them, disappoint them or disagree with them or they will turn their back on you so fast . . ." It was a "friends, you can't live with 'em . . ." moment.

While all that may be true, there is something even more true - real friendships rock! For some reason we still believe in imperfect people. Call us crazy, but we keep investing in the building of relationships! We are experiencing the fullness of friends that can fail us and we can fail them, yet we still want each other. Today, even on this very day, we need our friends. We have a family member that needs prayer and we have friends that are praying. We have friends saying "What can we do?" and they mean it! We're so grateful we haven't given up on friends.

Have you ever had a friend let you down, disappoint you or even betray you? How do you get through broken or ailing relationships? Do you know how to remove relational shrapnel? How do you recover and enjoy friendships after moments of deep disappointment? Here are some important practices to live into relational health:

Take the time to discern
Do you have broken or ailing relationships? Are you at fault? Are you innocent of any wrongdoing? Are you unkind, judgmental or unforgiving? Be honest with yourself and God.

Take time to forgive and repent
Take the time in prayer to forgive (sometimes again and again) the person who hurt you. Ask God to give you His compassion for them. The Scripture tells us when we pray to say, "forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors."

If you were wrong, ask God to forgive you. Ask the person you've wronged to forgive you. You may need a spiritual mentor or friend to help you in this process. Don't let pride rip you off.

Take time to begin again!
Once you deal with relational brokenness it's time to begin again. You may or may not be able to rebuild with those newly forgiven situations, but God will provide new ways to enjoy your life. Connect in a ministry project and/or a Life Group with imperfect people who love God. Look for ways to be a friend and watch friendships emerge. In the midst of life's losses and difficulties, we pray that you will experience relationships that will go the distance.

Friends, you can't live without 'em,



Hope you can join us this weekend during the Facebook series. This is week four and "Friends" is the subject. You won't want to miss our surprise! Invite a friend here

Recommended Reading: Relationships 101 by Les and Leslie Parrot

Forward this email to a friend.

©2008 Scott & Clare Loughrige

Your Faith has Saved You

Scripture thought for the week:Jesus said to the woman, "Your faith has saved you; go in peace." Luke 7:50 (NIV)

Dear Friend,
Are you at peace today? Are you aware of your need for God at this moment? Are you looking for Him to be your Friend... Teacher... Provider... Counselor... Comforter... Rescuer... Saviour?

The words in Luke 7:50 were originally spoken to a woman in need. This particular woman had a reputation. This woman came into a room and began to worship at Jesus' feet in tears. Everyone in the room knew who she was and what she had done. She was unaware of people at that moment. She was expressing her worship to the One she needed.

At first glance one might think that the words of this scripture in Luke were directed to her alone, but they were spoken for everyone to hear. Some were practicing a form of welcoming Jesus, but their hearts were far from Him. Some in that room were judging the worship that was going on. Some were in debt and didn't realize it. Every person had a form of connection to Jesus, only the woman had real faith connection to him.

Whenever we know who we really are; when we become honest about our own condition with God; when we are fully engaged in the awareness of God's presence and refuse to look around, criticize, complain or judge others; we will honestly worship and hear the words we long to hear, "Your faith has saved you; go in peace." These are words we all need to hear on this day.

Action Steps to Find God's Peace:
Find a place to get alone
Read Luke 7:36-50
Be aware of your present condition
Put away thoughts of others and what they should or shouldn't be doing
Acknowledge your need for God
Worship Him offering words of honor and adoration
Listen for His words of peace to you

Peace,



You're invited this Sunday to the Facebook Series: "Interested In". We will discover ways to know and connect with God at a deeper level. You don't want to miss this week's message.

©2008 Scott & Clare Loughrige

New FAQ Blog is up!

Hello Friends and Family of Crossroads,

If you haven't heard the BIG NEWS click here and scroll down to the message on 8-03-08 titled "Big News". Once you have heard the vision of Crossroads Church and the blessing of this new opportunity to reach this region with the Good News, feel free to submit a question here. (Please allow 5-7 business days for your question -- and the answer -- to appear.)

This FAQ section is designed to keep our church family updated on the progress of our new land opportunity and building plans. Our Eldership Team and Pastoral Staff are open to ANY and ALL questions! The only wrong questions are the ones not asked or the ones asked to people who can't give you accurate information. All of our leaders will be regularly updated at the Leadership Community meetings (next meeting- 9-27). They will also be able to help direct you to the correct information.

This will be our faithful effort to provide factual, up-to-date information. Check back often, as we will update this section with new information as it becomes available.

Let the Conversations begin!!
We look forward to it.

Committed to Christ and this region,
Your Pastors,

"So let us concentrate on the things that make for harmony and the growth of our fellowship together."

Romans 14:19

P.S. For those without web access, we will continue to encourage them to call the office and speak to anyone on our staff.

©2008 Scott & Clare Loughrige

Share Courage Today

Scripture thought for the week: "Therefore encourage one another and build each other up. . ." 1 Thessalonians 5:11

Dear Friend,
Do you need a word of courage today? Try giving courage away and see what happens. The word encourage means to impart courage, to urge forward. We all need that! We find if we need courage we should look for someone we can give courage to. Then, it's amazing . . . our own hearts get stronger!

Unfortunately, we all have relationships that dampen our courage; relationships that feed on the "what if's," the impossibilities or the negatives of life. Proverbs tells us "the tongue of the wise brings healing." Do you look for ways to heal and encourage people? Do your words bring hope, health and strength? Or do you waste your gift of words in gossip, nay-saying or negativity? Relationships were given to us by God to help one another reach our God-given potential. We were made to build each other, heal each other, to urge one another forward!

So here is our word to you: God made you in His image. You matter to Him and to His purposes on the earth. Your life can reach its full potential as you love Him and other people. Receive the truth of God's words about you and others. He formed you and the people you are in relationship with to accomplish great things on the earth. He desires that you enjoy His love for you and the beauty of the life He created you for. We believe in you because we believe in the God who made you. Receive courage from God today! Refuse to partake in hearing or speaking words of negativity or discouragement. Believe in God, believe in the work He is doing in you and others and watch healing and courage rise up!

Action Steps:
Begin your day reading words of life from Scripture, slowly, savoring each word.
Reflect and allow God to speak to you from what you read.
Allow the words or phrases to speak to you all day.
Write them down and keep them with you.
Look for opportunities to encourage someone else with those very words.

This, our dear friends, is the un-vicious cycle of courage.

Be Encouraged Today,

News and Such . . .
Remember to pray for the families who were victims on September 11th, for our country and its leaders who take counsel for the world and its tragedies.
Also pray for Pastor Carlo. The families, the schools and the churches have survived the terrible hurricanes! Many who lost their homes are staying in the churches and because of Crossroads Church they are all being fed! All praise be to God! Thank you, Crossroads partners!

©2008 Scott & Clare Loughrige

You're in the Family Now

Scripture thought for the week:

You are a member of God's very own family and you belong in God's household with every other Christian.
Ephesians 2:19-20 (Living Bible)

Dear Friend,
In case you never noticed, we love being a part of God's family! We have experienced the meaning of life by loving God and loving people. Our hearts have never been more fully alive and in motion to care for the broken and the poor in this region and around the world. It's all because we belong to God and others. The connection to God's family has made our lives ROCK! We thank God for making it possible to live with this level of grace and richness.

The day you said yes to enter into faith in God through Jesus Christ, you were connected to God Himself and His family. Your victories became ours to celebrate. Your challenges became ours to intercede for. God wanted you in His family and so do we! But are you getting and giving all you really want in the family of God? Are you feeling connected in name only but not experiencing the power of belonging to God's very own family?

Some of you feel very connected to family and friends in this life. Others feel like a rock or an island. Why? How can someone move into a place of being loved, cherished, needed and wanted. . . connected at a deep level?

More connection points are available in today's world than ever before. Facebook, MySpace, YouTube, Friendster, eHarmony . . . we are overloaded with opportunities to know and be known at a "deep" level. All you need is to get online. Right? For many however, our attempts at networking our lives relationally has left us lacking the core of what we're really after - a life that is making a difference. A difference individually and also in community. . . a family.

We want to invite you to experience the Facebook series for the next 4 weeks at Crossroads. We are going to study God's Words about connecting our relational lives in ways that will satisfy your soul and can change the world for Jesus' sake. In this series we will discover how rich life can be when we find ourselves deeply connected to God and people. We hope to see you here!

For the Family,

Click here to invite a friend to church for this series.

©2008 Scott & Clare Loughrige